Subway - m4w - 39 (Owings Mills)
You just finished ordering your lunch as I begin to order mine. You
asked if the sandwich I was getting was any good as you had wanted to
try it but have yet to do so. I answered and asked what you were having
as I paid for mine. Yours looked delicious! We exchanged a pleasant
goodbye as we kept our day moving along. Perhaps we can continue our
short conversation and share a couple of laughs together? Name the
sandwiches in the subject line so I know it's you.
Oh, Subway. You're like the Cupid of the modern age. "Yours looked delicious!" Calm down there, stabby. You're going to scare her away before she even gets in the back of your van. Then how will you continue your short conversation about sandwiches? Seriously, though, what is left to be said? "My sandwich was tasty...WHELP! All caught up! Glad we reconnected." Name the sandwiches, he says. Name. The Sandwiches. Le sigh...
Where we went wrong - m4w - 28
It's been a week since we last saw each other. I doubt we will see each
other again. I have done alot of thinking over the week. I have pin
pointed what went wrong with us. It was my medications. I was mean and
nasty before them but never violent. I just wish we both noticed that
the meds were the problem. I haven't taken two of them since that day.
And I feel great! Not a crazy thought about what you may be doing or
anything. Just relaxed and focused on the task at hand. If you happen to
read this, know that I am serious. I have had no urge to drink, play
cards, or even get angry at anything. I have a felted the fact that I
may never see you again or be with you. It hurts but it's what's best
for you. It feels really good to have my head straight again! It just
happened a little too late.
IT WAS MY MEDICATIONS. I did not see that coming. And I know we're not supposed to laugh at (what I'm presuming is) mental illness, but this post is hilarious. Look, lady, he's not having any more crazy thoughts about what you might be doing or anything and he just wants you to know that and know that he's focused on the task at hand which is completing his life sized replica of you made from human feces. And now, I present to you the greatest sentence ever typed: "I have no urge to drink, play cars, or even get angry at anything." We can all stop writing now. There's really no need to continue, because no one is ever going to say anything remotely as cogent or entertaining ever again.
I need money ASAP!! - w4m - 18 (Baltimore, MD.)
Hi. I am an Black 18 year old who needs $140 by 9 o clock tonight in
order to keep my apartment. I live with my sister and her son so you
would have to host. I would of course do something for you in return
whether it be a date, pics, ect... YOU MUST LIKE BBW'S! If you can offer
at least $90 that would be fine. Respond ASAP through email if you are
interested. Your pics get mine. Age and Race doesn't matter.
Guys, these posts are getting exponentially better. I don't even know what to say about this one. She needs $140 by 9 o'clock, but if you can offer at least $90 that would be fine. Excellent. And you gotta like 'em plump. You have to. There's no other way this is going to work. And OF COURSE she would give you something in return. I mean, you're not just GIVING her the money. She'll be your date, or send you pictures or even ECT. And in case you were thinking "But I'm a 54 year old Inuit. No way she'll take my money." Fear not! Age and race do NOT matter. She's desperate AND open-minded.
You live upstairs and I shouldn't be writing this - m4w (CV)
You moved in upstairs about a month ago now... we haven't seen much of
each other. That's probably how it should be, but definitely not how I'd
like it.
I'll be leaving soon, but if you want to... make some mistakes... before I do, you know exactly how to find me. How do I know? Well, Comcast made sure of that, didn't they..?
I'll be leaving soon, but if you want to... make some mistakes... before I do, you know exactly how to find me. How do I know? Well, Comcast made sure of that, didn't they..?
Here we go. Right here. The fucking night cap on these crazy posts. "I shouldn't be writing this" It's true, but not for the reasons he's thinking. Is he coming across as crazy to anyone else? ANYONE? No? Fine. "That's probably how it should be" Why? What's going to happen if you see more of her, you crazy asshole? "you know exactly how to find me." YOU LIVE DOWNSTAIRS. IN THE SAME BUILDING. What did Comcast do to you? Show me on the post where they touched you. Then tell me what I'm wearing so I know it's you.
I'm spent. I could write a thesis on these weirdos in Baltimore. See you later. And do everyone a favor and get back on your meds.
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